PRIAPISM!

That's the way Kruella likes it.

Always hard or not at all.

To be fair, Kruella is *not* the only pervert in the guild. Far from it. In fact, the vast majority of us are. It's just that... *most* of the time... we try... *TRY*... to keep it under control.

It... is... difficult... however... *not* "hard"... to restrain ourselves... when we have Kru in our group.

All it takes from her is just one, perfectly timed giggle.

She would assert that it's an innocent giggle.

Perhaps "innocent" isn't quite the correct word for it.

Simple, instinctual, maybe... But you get the idea.

Honestly, I do the same kind of thing.

Someone in the group will say something that (unwittingly) falls into the category of double entendre, and I will let out with a chuckle into voice chat. Sometimes even a deep-belly laugh.

Which is why Kru was the one to point out, quite clearly, that if it weren't for the gutter, my mind would be homeless. Too right, Kru!

On occasion, others in the group will even respond with a "that's what she said."

But it's never quite as amusing as when Kru does it.

Particularly since she is a lifetime member of the fairer gender.

But I think it all has something to do with the unstated prerequisite that anyone who wishes to join the Face Stabbing Misfits must, in some way, at least to some small extent, have a perverted side to them.

I mean, the Face Stabbers are a mature guild.

Not that everything that goes on within guild and/or voice chat should be rated NC-17, but that we all appreciate adult humor. Nor do we necessarily restrain ourselves from using coarse language. But that our behavior is still respectful, despite having adult themes and/or undertones.

It's just that Kru and I happen to be the more vocal of the group.

But that Kru has a particular talent for opening the flood gates.

Such as it was last night...

We had logged into our lowbies, so that we could run with Kru, as she has not yet brought any of her characters up to Dragon Raid level. Yet.

The question was put before the group... what to run. Bashal had suggested either STK, Shan-To-Kor, or Tangleroot, meaning the Splinterskull Fortress quest chain within the Tangleroot Gorge. (I'm getting carried away with commas this morning.)

Because we were all more concerned with hanging out with our friends and enjoying each other's company within the game, rather than imposing the false burden of "having" to complete something, we all expressed some degree of ambivalence toward the decision.

We left it up to Bashal!

I mean, as Guild Leader, it's my prerogative to delegate responsibility to the officers as I see fit.

Perhaps I might have been mildly abusing my authority as Guild Leader, but... Bashal *IS* an officer...

So, he decided for us... Tangleroot... and no one objected. And, we made our way out confer with Chief Ungrz and offer him our assistance.

As we approached the quest entrance, the question was put forth to the group, what level of difficulty. After all, we could open the first quest in the chain on Elite, and the Favor from completing the quest on such a difficulty contributes to the goal of earning the Pendant of Time from the Elves of House Phiarlan.

After a full round of "I dunno's" and "I don't care's," Bashal finally declared that it was the Cleric's decision.

Bashal had found a way to reverse the delegation and sent the decision back to me.

Yeah... I was running Taciturn... the Cleric.

I announced to the group that I didn't care. That they all fully realized that their so-called Cleric was in fact a Trin-built Cleric, and that they assumed responsiblity for whatever risk may be associated with their choice, but that I'd simply follow along with whatever they chose.

So, once again, I delegated.

It was Harshbringer (Tanision) who made the decision to open the quest on Elite...

;)

It didn't take long to determine that such a decision might not have been the most wise, but we continued on despite the obvious challenge.

But, *while* we were slogging our way through, Kru asked how many character slots we were now allowed within the game...

Kruella has a penchent for giving her characters names that *could* (and generally *do*) have suggestive meanings, depending upon how someone might read it.

And they're always names that we Face Stabbers enjoy, particularly due to the nature of our membership.

If you know what I mean.

Upon completing the first quest in the chain, though, Bashal decided he had to call it an evening, lest he wake up in the morning with an impression of his keyboard upon his forehead. Which actually simplified things, as Belzur had logged in and wanted to join us, but the group had already been filled.

So, after sending Bashal off to bed and bringing Racenda (Belzur) in to replace him, we continued on.

Both with the Splinterskull Fortress quest chain, and with our discussion of what Kru should name her characters.

When DDO was first released, each player was limited to six characters per server, per account. Over the course of the past three-plus years, that limit has increased to the current legal limit of ten characters per server, per account. However, when (if) Module 9 is finally released, players will be able to purchase six additional character slots, up to a total legal limit of sixteen characters per server, per account, using the new Turbine Points system.

Which led Kruella so solicit suggestions for names for her characters.

And a rather entertaining, if not adult-oriented conversation.

Which Bashal was now missing out on.

Silly Bashal.

In the midst of this discussion, Harshbringer (Tanision) asked which difficulty for the next quest in the chain... Normal or Hard.

Actually, as I recall, Tan asked "How d'you guys want it? Normal or Hard?"

*THAT* is when Kru giggled into voice chat.

And then, so did Lilmortician, running on her lowbie, of course.

Which caused me to laugh out loud... in voice chat.

And, although we couldn't hear them, I'm sure both Soulencer and Belzur were now laughing out loud, too.

Tanision hadn't realized what he'd said.

Until we ~explained~ it to him.

That only served to make the conversation all the more entertaining.

Which is where the conversation turned to the subject of Priapism. Particularly since Kru likes her "quests" Hard, or not at all. From the male perspective, I tend to agree. It seems that certain "quests" would be... pleasureable... only when run "Hard."

It *is* funny, though, how quickly our conversation went into the gutter from that point.

Tan only verified "Hard" on one other occasion.

After that, he gave up.

Chicken! :-P

Rest assured, though, Priapism was a subject of extended discussion throughout the evening.

Especially so when Racenda charmed one of the Hobgoblins. Which remained charmed. For a... very... long... time...

Having been previously released from my inhibitions for the evening, and with regard to the now excessively "charmed" Hobgoblin, I declared into voice chat "this is what's wrong with Priapism... you get it "hard" and then you can't do anything with it..."

I'm pretty sure I heard each and every member of the group fall out of their chairs, laughing so... hard... that they each needed both a bottle of oxygen and a break for the restroom.

Nevertheless, I maintain that if you can't have fun in-game, you shouldn't be playing.

However that may be taken...

Keep it fun!